the joy of using twitter

Twitter is silly and I enjoy using it for that very reason.  Last night, I did a “play by play” type of commentary on the movie, E.T.: The Extra Terrestrial. Observe:

• Believe it or not, watching E.T. for the first time ever. I have a feeling this is going to be wacky! LOL!
• omg the E.T.s are so hideous!
• LOL this is sort of like District 9 except better.
• E.T. seems to have trouble breathing. Does he have asthma or bronchitis? I hope it dies.
• Don’t eat the Reese’s Pieces Elliot!, E.T. infected them!!! DON’T TRUST THAT UGLY THING!!!!
• Don’t fall asleep! It will SEXUALLY molest you!!!
• See, it gave you a fever. That’s what you get for trusting that alien piece of shit.
• Eh, Elliot’s a loner. No wonder he’s hanging out with E.T. Stupid protagonist kid.
• E.T. IS DROWNING!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY!
• Maybe the big brother will kill it.
• Elliot straight up disses ball culture and the gay and transgendered community. What if E.T. is into voguing and stuff?
• E.T. is JESUS!? WTF?
• E.T.’s stupid. Why don’t he just borrow Elliot’s bike and fly back home.
• I hope a wolf eats E.T.
• DIE E.T. DIE!
• Yes. NASA will eliminate the intergalactic terrorist threat. I sort of wish Michael Bay directed this. There’d be explosions everywhere.
• E.T. getting blasted with an M4 would be tight. LOL!
• I bet Dr. House would know how to heal E.T. Dr. House is the man.
• Eww, I wouldn’t even touch the filthy mofo even if my life depended on it. It needs a bath or something.
• Supporting the enemy. I hope Elliot’s family goes to jail for this.
• omg, these police officers are unprofessional. USE YOUR FIREARMS AND SHOOT THE KIDS.
• E.T. got lucky.

I’m surprised no one has unfollowed me…. yet.